Big Girls Can Do Hard Things

After learning how close we were to the vale it took a great deal of stregth to move forward.  The staff at the hospital was wounderful and supportive, I cannot describe what these days were like there was a moment I believed I might have to say goodbye and I did not know how I would ever face that.  After a couple days Tony and I decided we would face each day one step at a time and enjoy every moment without letting an uncertain future determine our present.  I wanted to allow Madison to experience everything that is good in this world that she could and the amazing Respitory theropists and nurses worked together so Madison could finnaly go outside. She could see the sun and the sky I wanted so badly for he to experience the world outside the hospital.

On April 1, 2012 Madison got to go outside for the first time in her 14 months on this earth. She was both confused and so excited, from the elivator ride to the rotating door leading outside Madison could not look at it all fast enough.  She sat and stared at the sky for several minutes.  It was perfect, and she loved it 

Sudenly, after experiencing the outside Madison began to improve dramatically.  Her oxygen went down, her saturations came up and we started getting our sweet happy little princess back.  It was as if we had finnaly given her enough motivation to break out of the NICU. 

 She found her Smile and started to laugh and play again.

 I love this picture because Madison HATES baths except when they are given by her Ms. Sarah Clark so this is the only happy bath picture I have of my little princess.

We Joked that Madison simply wanted her Ms. Barb to come back from vacation and she would be fine.  Sure enough back for just a few days and Madison was imroving and bewildering all of her care givers.

She even got her glasses to help fix her lazy eye, she was not super happy with them but they sure are sticken cute!!!!!








I was so proud of her she is such a fighter I am and will always be amazed by the courage and determination Madison has.  She is my super hero I am truelly so blessed to be her Mamma.  

My angels hands

Are quite soft they hold my heart so tight

When I just can't take the pain they help me through the fight

My angels hands

Are gentle too they always seem to be

Just the touch to make me laugh tickle and comfort me

My angels hands

are not big in fact there very small

                                                        But they have tought me oh so much

                                                   And they can teach us all

         My angels hands

             Are beautiful and perfect as can be

              And when I hold her hand so tight

          It's her who's lifting me